This depression/anxiety thing is a weird thing, a really weird thing
For 20 years I have been seeing shrinks, doctors, therapists of every persuasion, describing my flares and telling them how when I eat certain carbohydrates they are triggered
Each had their own version of what this could be but one thing they were all certain of was that this was psychological, either anxiety or depression
They told me to take this mind altering medication or that mind altering medication or try this psychotherapy or that psychological therapy. None worked, all made me more poorly, but the fact that all this 'therapy stuff' was what was actually making me mentally ill was never considered. I just kept being told that I needed to have happy thoughts etc
When I asked what would happen if I just stopped eating these foods they wrote down I may be anorexic (even though I was 222lb) and wrote that maybe I was bulimic etc. None of them would accept my version that when I eat these carbohydrates they are doing my back in, can I not eat them?
No, no no no no no, you cannot do that, they would tell me, carbohydrates are a staplem they are essencial for health if you do not eat them you will get cholestrol, maybe die. Not eating the carbohydrates I mentioned could be dangerous, lead to death I was told and so for 20 years against what my inner self was telling me I arried on eating the poison that was destroying me
Even over the last 5 years whilst I have been cutting them out I still ensured I had the 'minimum' amount for survivial Drrrrrrrrrr
Anyway since being here all the carbohydrates that I believe are damamging my body have been eliminated, and that is not just starch and lactose in my case
I have at least two other pathogens that require limited carbohydrate intake to ensure they are controlled that are in addition to this pathogen doing my back in
Since removing all the carbohydrate foods I know are doing me harm I have had no flares, not one. I have had no flares in 8 weeks, not one. And therefore by definition, no deprssion/anxiety either
I have told my doctor that I want it written on my records that under no circumstances must I ever be given antidepressants ever again and that in my opinion it is antidepressants that induce the deep weird, uncontrolable feeling I get when I cannot cope and that the so called depression all those medications they have been giving me never was depression in the first place, it was flares from a reactive form of arthritis
I am no longer going to go into these doctors offices again and try to prove I am mentally feeble. From now on it is their job to prove these flares and other symptoms I experience are not physical and not related to my carbohydrate intake
I have told them this. I have told them that if they believe I am a depressive person and that these flares are being caused by the way I think and not by starch/lactose and other carbohydrate foods then I want the journals and other evidence they have
Since putting this proposal to them I have had a gene test, blood tests, a x-ray of my sacroiliacs turn up and an offer of a new Rhumatologist
There are so many other folk I know that are living in these same traps, going around and around with therapist which frankly do not have clue what they are talking about
But, and this is the big but for me, although most shrinks are useless in my eyes, there are a handful that are very very good
It was a therapist that told me to stop listening to the doctors and eliminate them carbohydrates. she told me nutrition would help me get well and she supported me when no doctors would.
she taught me about the nutritional value of foods and she showed me evidecne about how certain carbohydrates can unbalance the brain and body
I studied work relating to autism, ADHD, Parkinson's, MS, Candida, Fibromalgia, diabetes and many other illnesses.
Although I never studied any form of arthritis. I had been told by the doctors this thing I describe cannot be Arthiritis because folk with Fibro do not get arthritis, yeah yeah. Anyway I did not study AS or any other form of Arthritis because i believed I definately did not have an arthritis. I learned all about this other stuff and realised that if I did cut back, right back on the foods that were poisoning me and replace them with certain foods, healing foods, I might start recovering from what they shrinks were telling me was my deep inner insecurity that I was in denial about YEAH YEAH
Anyway, I worked on this night and day for five years and when I came here just a couple of months ago I had almost worked it out. My starch was down to 20g
Anyway, since then it has been at nothing, no starch whatsoever, along with all the other foods I had already eliminated and now I have no flares or as the shrinks call it, depression/anxiety that creats pain in my body because I cannot deal with feelings
ARhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
If this is psychological and I am causing this myself by my thinking then how is it I have an injury to my sacroiliac joints. What is the limp about and the IBS. I can not be in a right argument and it does not get triggered but one teaspoon of starch and its a sure thing
I am not having a go at you Finnari, because I know you are not daft enough to do all this what these doctors have done with me but honestly, a gaunt face with sad eyes and muddled thinking is not just about feelings and thoughts there can be something serious going on.
And I cannot argue with you regarding the yoga, meditationa nd all that stuff because it does help, even with the flares, but finding the cause, in my case the starch, was and still is the beginning of me getting well and I can now say sort my records out and get rid of all that junk you say about me because it is not true. But they are not going to get rid of all that junk now are they. They are going to be keeping all that on my records. And next when I loose my temper they will be telling me I need anger management
Listen, I am just expressing my thoughts here. It is not you personally. but you know that. You are a good bloke and I know your comments are ment to be helpful in the kindest way. You are not a synical type, you are a genuine person, and I know that, so please don't take anything I say here personal to you because it is not you that has driven me crazy. It's folk that have read a few psychology books and think they know what they clearly do not know.
Don't hate me for posting this I just want you to know how this can all go wrong
Love Joanne
Last edited by joannesford; 10/09/10 10:22 PM.
