I recently had some friends over & one asked if my problems I was dealing with a couple weeks ago were any better.. (I had to not attend a gathering because of a flare..hubby said I was not feeling well). I chuckled at him and didn't know what to say.

So I gathered a handful of spoons and did 'the spoon theory' with him and explained that my bad days (running out of spoons) doesn't mean I have a level 10 pain, it may mean I have ZERO energy to do anything but lay on the couch a couple hours. Because I am dressed with makeup and a smile today doesn't mean I am all better... it means I am able to function right now. And I'll never know when I will crash. So if I get very quiet and seem like I am mad, it is because I am crashing... so ignore me and don't worry.

Feeling 'not well' for me is not being sick with the flu or a nasty cold. Walking with a cane does not mean I haI ve something broke that is healed by the next time I walk and don't use the cane...

I've started home businesses like DOW and have had a waiting list of orders... and the more I got asked to be added to the list, the less energy I had to make any of the orders! It is a difficult thing to deal with. SOmeone can catch me on a good day and I'll say 'yes' and only to find that that day was rare and I will not be able to do any work in a long while. So I just stopped taking comission work and have decided to post for sale my items as I get the energy to create. Sadly, it's been much too long and I fear I've lost my touch...sigh....

At my recent diability exam for the VA the doc was talking to me about working.. I told her.. I cannot work because I never know if I can go to work each day or if I'll have to go home early!

It is a horrible situation to be in. I can't even send my kids to school because I may not be able to get them up in the mornings or help them with their projects or go to their school events....!] or what happens if they get sick in school and I am wiped out at home.. unable to move, let alone drive to get them!

~ Trudi: homeschooling mom to 6: 16,14,11,9,7, 6 mos