Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion #1 AS Web Support Group Sorry to take so long......

Hello to all,

I'm sorry to take so long to get back to all of you. We went back to the Cleveland Clinic Wed. to talk to the drs. concerning my doing the trials for the kidney cancer.

We all agreed, me mostly, that I am too tired and nowhere near strong enough to take the trial medicine. The trials are experimental, meant to find how far the body will go before it gives up. I just don't feel like I can be someones guinea pig right now. It's been a bad kind of couple of weeks and I've been telling my husband if thais is the best life has to offer I'm not interested. I need some quality here.

I haven't felt good at all since before last Feb. and even before that truthfully. I worked and slept that was it. Those closest to me here know I haven't been good for a very very long time

One dr. asked if I was interested in time and I said yes. I'm much better with truth than guesses. We are not God and anything miraculous can happen but no one lives with this cancer. They said 6 months, I felt that already.

Today I signed up for the Hospice program here, they will help with so much. I already have a brand new wheel chair so I could have a bit of freedom. With the oxygen and the walker I was spending a lot of days in bed........hating that.

Please don't think I don't believe in prayer and miracles.......I do and I'm not giving up but I've got to get through the day here and it's getting very hard to do.

Please keep the prayers coming, I need your strength so much, now more than ever.

love to all of you............................

linda

Hi Linda

You have our good thoughts and prayers. Always. Never a question.

Eric said to send you lots of lovins and hugs.

Take care

Lori & Eric

Hang in there Linda, i'am pulling for you, you are in my thoughts all the time,we have to fight this damn crap.I will be there anytime for you............................John(LC)

Linda,
My dayly prayers are for you as well as for our other good friend John(LC)
You take care of yourself first. Don't be letting those people use you for an experiment.
Love you
Ray

Dear Linda,

Thank you for writing to all of us I know it must be so draining.

I can certainly understand your shying away from experiments. I hope the new wheelchair gives you more freedom to be out of bed and outside catching a few warm sun rays? Find enjoyment in whatever form you can until you are stronger.
As always I am sending you lots of positive energy, smiles and prayers.

Stay strong and stubborn!
peace
Kathy



"The most beautiful stones have been tossed by the wind and washed by the waters and polished to brilliance by life's strongest storms."

Hi Linda,

You are truly one of the bravest people I know. Glad to hear the wheelchair will give you some freedom. All my strength, prayers and good energy goes out to you. Keep posting when you have the energy. Take care.

Deborah

You are right my beautiful friend..
you need quality of life...and I am glad the wheelchair will offer you some freedom. i also know you are not giving up ...you just want honest answers and being realistic as possible. you dont need to be anyones guinea pig not now or later. it's important you gain some of your strength back...so rest all you need. you know your body better than anyone else.

you do what you feel is right for you right now. we're here for you always. love and prayers never end for you linda....

we love you....


Buggy

Hi Linda, You are in my thoughts and prayers. Take Care ....Hope

Hi Linda,

So sorry to hear how severe your situation really is. I can't imagine how hard it must be to confront the notion that Hospice is necessary.

I'm so glad that you somehow find the strength to post despite your fatigue. You are such a significant part of KickAS and it is a treasure to read all of your posts.

It was obvious from when you first posted here that you cared about this place and from your post it seems lots of folks here love having you amidst us. I am one of them.

I don't know what your future holds. Heck I don't know what my tommorow holds but I hope to see lots more of you in the days to come on this internet sorta world. Fight the best fight you can and know how many of us are pulling for you and how lucky we are to know you.



 
stevec-they also serve who stand and wait

Hi! This is all so much for one to endure but dont ever forget that miracles do happen. I have 2 grandsons who show you that. They were in car accidents that should have left them dead. But doctors have said they are both very much miracles and that they are very lucky to be alive, but I think it wasnt luck GOD took care of them and he will look after you also. Take good care of yourself and rest and try to keep your spirits high. My prayers and thoughts are with you>>>>>Connie