John
With respect, I couldn't agree less with most of what you said.
My heart sank when I saw you had commented on this post of Kevin's because I thought you might say something negative and you have. It's a shame because it kind of illustrates the point.
I think if one person in need gets scared away from the "#1 AS Web Support Group" it is a traversty. Members are people not numbers and each and every person is important. It is not good enough to tell them to look elsewhere - we should constantly be reviewing our behaviour and conduct to ensure that they are good at heart.
I don't think that most people get upset about a heated debate, as such, I think people get upset when other members directly insult, patronize and undermine other members - but I may be wrong.
If one wants to spar with someone, or take a very strong view (which in your heart you know might be provocative and aggressive) one should save that for outside the main forum - in my opinion.
For example if you take strong issue with what someone says, perhaps a private message could deal with the matter without everyone having to witness it - or it having a poisioning effect on a post - perhaps killing it stone dead.
There is only too much "ever-so-cute and agreeable" ness if it is not genuine. If you are speaking from the heart it is the difference between caring and patronising.
As far as the doctors thing goes - I think that if you are speaking from personal experience about a doctor letting you down, then fine. But when the majority (I believe) of the KickAS population rely on doctors and medication to get out of bed in the morning it should be rememembered that it is as inflammatory and insutling to dis the medical profession as it is for someone to dis the NSD or LSD or anything else that is your treatment choice.
It is one thing to inadvertantly upset someone, but quite another to go hell for leather about something and in doing so alienate and insult people. One can get a point across and at the same time remain civil and courteous to others.
There is no right and wrong - it's all about respecting other peoples views and ideas, but also about respecting the fact that we all are (or have a relative or friend) suffering from a chronic, painful, degenerative disease. Love and support come before anything else, in my view.
Please feel free to PM me about this, John. I would have preferred to PM what I have just said to you. I feel uncomfortable about saying my piece publicly and do not want to damage Kevin's kind and supportive post, but I don't know how else I can talk to you.
I am not always great at expressing myself and if you would like me to clarify anything I have said, or if indeed, I have offended you in any way - please PM me and I will talk to you about it.
Respectfully (I hope),
Tink
