Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion #1 AS Web Support Group I hope this helps you

I recently wrote an article about my experience with AS and it was published on Elephant Journal. May it uplift you, comfort you, let you know u are not alone and there is light at the end of the tunnel. I am not fully healed, but I am much better. And happier and stronger for having gone through what I went through. Some things make sense only in retrospect. AS has been my greatest teacher.

Here is the link:

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/01/10-life-lessons-learned-from-a-chronic-illness/

I really liked your link, thank you.

Hi Kristine,

Thank you for sharing this link with us.

You have a beutiful way of expressing yourself, very unique.

I loved the control freak part

Yes, AS can change your mentally, affect your plans, crush your dreams but never let it crush you spirit.

I wish I had a strong desire to live like you do.

Somedays I just sit and wonder what's the point of going on with life when I know there is no cure and it will only get worse with time.

Hello dmx07!

First, I want to say I feel you. I had so many instances when I thought, "If someone told me now things will never get better, I would kill myself RIGHT THIS INSTANT." It was very, very hard. Apart from the indescribable pain, every day was a mental battle, to keep going, to keep looking for what was actually good about my life. When I was crippled and bed-ridden, I would (again and again) write a list of all the things I could still do, like laugh and type and chew and brush my teeth (even though that too was painful to do).

Just keep going. Explore alternative modalities of healing. I have tried so many. Some worked, some didn't. I am still trying new things and endlessly learning. Keep positive:-)

And thank you for the positive feedback. It means a lot to me, because I have always been very unsure about whether I can actually write.

Your life matters and things WILL get better! So keep going!

Hi Kristine,

Of course you can write and you are doing it beautifully in your own special way :-)

It's clear that you love language and you are extremly social.

I am not sure if you have read my other posts but apart from AS I also have asthma and Tietze's syndrome.

So I have constant spinal pain, suffocation from asthma and constant chest pain from Tietze.

Some mornings I need 30 minutes to lift myself out of bed.

Are you still on methotrexate?

Hi dmx07! Just saw your message.

No, I haven't read your other posts. I actually haven't been here quite awhile. I used to be really active, and it was helpful in many ways, but after some time i realized i needed to seek my own path to healing, because what worked for others didn't work for me. And what worked for me didn't necessarily work for others.

I am on biologics right now (Enbrel), and I've stopped methotrexate. My rheumatologist does advise taking methotrexate while on Enbrel. He says it works better. I don't know.. I just don't feel good relying to heavily on drugs for my healing. I take this natural supplement called "Stem Enhance", which really helps improve my energy (I used to be a walking zombie).

I did try getting off Enbrel. Things turned really bad, was back on it two weeks later.

It's heartbreaking for me to imagine the kind of pain you are in. I know it's really, really hard. How long have you been in that condition?

Are u considering seeking alternative treatments?

I hope to hear from u soon. And will check your other posts:-)

-Kristine

Hi everyone! I recently wrote about the experience of chronic illness. What prompted me was someone making a mocking comment about how i had such an easy life, because i looked so happy and had to do less than the average person. Ha. People don't know what's going on inside our bodies and how we really feel. Please share the article if it will help someone in any way, or if there's someone living with a chronically ill person who might benefit from reading this.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/02/an-open-letter-from-someone-living-with-chronic-illness/