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Nov 2nd, 2025
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 336
Fourth_Degree_AS_Kicker
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OP
Fourth_Degree_AS_Kicker
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 336 |
Well i don’t know where to begin, the replies and PM i received have been nothing short of amazing and such a blessing to me. Last Thursday i think i hit an emotional wall. The months of constant pain and the months of feeling out of control in every aspect of my life finally came bubbling to the surface. I reached my breaking point. For several months i have been telling everyone that "oh I’m doing fine" when deep down i was not! Whenever i was alone i would sit there and cry. The last week or so i avoided people and places that i figured i would have to explain to people what was wrong with me cause i knew that if someone was to ask me I’d break down. I couldn’t even talk to my family, I was afraid that my kids would see me cry. So now it’s a week later and i am feeling a little better. The replies and pm's i have received have been, like i said amazing, I feel some what ashamed for feeling the way i was feeling because i know I’m not as bad off as some here on Kickas but still you wrote to me! Offering words of wisdom, words of support, and words of advice. I guess I’m not surprised by this fact, but it was the level of honesty, compassion and concern in the words that really had an impact. Your words have pulled me up from a very dark place yet again. I owe you all a debt i can never repay. I'm now taken an antidepressant, one that my doctor has been trying to get me to take for months now. So that is helping. But I’m far from being "my old self" again. I have a long road ahead of me and need to learn how to deal with this depression. But i know i have the support of some amazing friends here that will make the road back allot easier. So once again thank you all. My fondest wish is to someday be able to meet you all in person and thank you personally for what you have done for me over the last few days. Bless you all and thanks to you i think i have some strength to: Keep On Kicking Martin  "Trying to fly on broken wings"
<br>"Trying to fly on broken wings"
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 2,117
Major_AS_Kicker
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Major_AS_Kicker
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 2,117 |
Well hey there Martin it's good to see you back.
Welcome back,
Brent
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 725
Decorated_AS_Kicker
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Decorated_AS_Kicker
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 725 |
Hey Martin!
So glad that you are back. Please dont be ashamed of asking for help, maybe that is KA's biggest responsibility, helping people, when they need it. You have done nothing to be ashamed of but maybe given people the confidence to reach out and ask when help is needed - that can't be a bad thing.
I feel nothing but respect for you and I am really pleased to hear that you are feeling a bit better and stronger, with a few people on board to help you out - well everyone needs that.
Martin, I wish only the best for you and your family, I hope the days just keep getting easier.
God bless,
Debra
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 406
Black_Belt_AS_Kicker
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Black_Belt_AS_Kicker
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 406 |
Macky - I have been checking in to see if you would reply. I am so happy to see you here. I have a terrible time sharing my burden with friends and family so I tell them as little as possible. But I am slowly learning that when you feel like walking away, sometimes that is when you need the support the most. I'm glad you are back! Keep posting, KA needs you! All the best, Allison 
Allison
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 6,391 Likes: 1
Addicted_to_AS_Kickin
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Addicted_to_AS_Kickin
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 6,391 Likes: 1 |
Hey Martin Good to see you back. I can't even pretend to know what anyone here goes through, but I do know this....There have been times when I don't know what I would of done without the people of this wonderful place. It is like a big family only better. The warmth and caring here is out of this world. You will have your dream someday of meeting some of these wonderful people. Just keep pushing for it. Hugs, Lori 
"You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love........."   
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,934 Likes: 1
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,934 Likes: 1 |
Hi Martin Glad to hear your fighting spirit is making a come-back.  Chelsea
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 3,581
Royal_AS_kicker
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Royal_AS_kicker
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 3,581 |
Martin,
great to hear from you!!!!
David
IBD=It's Been Dreadful
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 773
Magical_AS_Kicker
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Magical_AS_Kicker
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 773 |
Macky,
Good to hear you back, you've taught us all a lesson or two. Maybe in times of need we can all lean on each other. Thanks, for letting us know.
Klem
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 362
Fifth_Degree_AS_Kicker
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Fifth_Degree_AS_Kicker
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 362 |
Hi Martin,
So glad to hear you are feeling a little better. Just keep a positive attitude. don't give up, there are a lot of people here willing to cheer you on.
Doreen
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 9,552 Likes: 10
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 9,552 Likes: 10 |
ALL RIGHT! Macky is back... three hurrays!
Hip, Hip Hurray!
Hip, Hip Hurray!
Hip, Hip Hurray!
Good to see you back Martin and glad to read you are feeling a little better. This site is great when you need a lift, it helped me through a rough spot as well.
Take care,
Tim
If you get up one more time than you fall, you will make it through - Chinese Proverb
AS may win some battles, but I will win the war.
KONK - Keep ON Kicking
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