Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion Friends and Family Support Group My husband is done taking care of me!

i second what donna is saying.

in 2009-2010 when i was in my worst pain and mostly at home, i reached out here, but didn't share much with my friends at work. i felt lonely and isolated, but if i had asked for their support, i'm sure in retrospect that they would have reached out. they each have young child, have been going through a lot of change in their personal lives, so i didn't want to bother them. in hind sight, i should have let them know then vs after the fact. its so easy for me to go within when i'm in trouble instead of reaching out.

if you've already tried, then i just want to say i'm sorry that no one will be there for you from the church.

Oh Pea!

This is the first time I've been to this forum so I had no idea what you were going through. I am so sorry! Having a chronic illness is bad enough as it is without your family's support. I don't come here often but I always check my personal email every day. If you're feeling really blue please drop me a line. I'd love to hear from you.
Many Hugs
Silvia

Very sorry Pea. I am not very close to my family, aside from hubby and daughters. The in-law side have never liked me. I have friends. But I don't like to overwhelm anyone, and feel oftentimes that I am doing so just by existing. I have found that those who do love me have sometimes been offended by that. It's a fine line to tread, and it usually stresses me out to do so.

My crafts and hobbies really help me distract me from pain, and focus. I urge to you find it in you somewhere, to pick up one of your favorite past times, and see if it helps to relieve the tension even a little bit.

(((hugs)))

Pea,
please call one of the ministers, tell him you need a visit. Chat for a bit and then ask him for prayer. It may be that each church thinks the other is caring for you!
I have learned the most, when my heart is sore from the grind of living.
I often write out my prayers, then read them aloud so that I am praying, not just thinking..

How can I help?

Br'er Lon

Just wrote a long update but don't know where it went! Thank you all for your caring and loving support. I hope I give half back of all that you give me.

I say you quit taking care of him! for better or worse is what I think that said.

I just read this, I know it's been a while since your last post but I am sending good wishes your way.

It has gone from bad to worst. Can't leave because I am disabled and he know's it. What he is doing is mentally abusive. He told me now that last year when I was flaring bad for 2 months was too much for him to handle but at the time was faking it making me believe all was well. He does this all the time. Tell's me things that he wouldn't at the time or hasn't told me at all and then springs it on me to hurt me. I am nothing of the person I used to be. He has kept me now in the cycle of depression and panic attacks.

Pea, I don't really know what to say, but wanted to send my support

Thank's Sue. Nobody understands what is like to have this disease accept us on the board. Now he did it again on our way down on our vacation to see my boy's. Dropped another bomb on me. We got another EMDR specialist to take us when we get back. He has a job interview down her in Sacramento and might have to take it if they offer it and it sounds like they want him already. I asked him if he really wanted to do it with our marriage in shambles and he said yes because it will help to be down here out of the cold damp climate. I am in a crazy cycle.